“When I grow up I want to have a beautiful white dress, flowers in my hair and a ring on my finger. When I grow up, I want to be married”

So this was every little girl’s dream growing up… To have the perfect wedding day. Little girls all over the world spent their time and energy planning the day where they’d be betrothed to their one true love…  Well clearly I didn’t get the memo because my dreams and desires consisted of getting recruited by the CIA or being asked politely to be Lara Croft’s protégée.

So who do we blame for this idea that is carefully planted into the minds of the females of tomorrow? Society? Nah…Society has enough issues to deal with… Ebola and whatnot (#toosoon). Disney? I mean they do encourage shacking up with seven midgets and marrying the first guy whose kiss brings you back to reality but Walt can’t take all the credit now can he?

I blame birth… No really look at it. At birth you are taught the simple facts of life; girls like pink. Boys like blue. Girls are cry-babies. Boys have no tears. I personally had a great fondness for black and I distinctively remember ripping the heads off of every doll I owned but enough about me and the reasons for my future Dr. Phil appointments. We as woman are told from our first high-heeled steps that our job description consists of three things; cook, clean, make babies. Now over time ‘gossip’ and ‘shop’ have been thrown in there but my point remains.

It’s true that girls mature faster than boys but we can’t blame biology for our constant need for a companion. We spend countless time on dating sites and reading sections of the magazines titled; HOOKING A MAN AND KEEPING ONE.  How about titling it; GETTING A DEGREE SO YOU CAN HIRE HIS BROKE ASS.

Yes I’m a feminist. I’m also a realist. Instead of going to school and doing something with your life, your plan is to matriculate (not as easy as it sounds… just ask anybody in high office…#hello) and marry the first creepy guy with car keys. Now what?  Your dearest hubby comes home smelling of beer and his secretary’s perfume and you’re livid. You yell and scream and threaten to leave him but leave him how? With what?  You’ve become his trophy wife and the conditions included alienating your friends and family. You’re not even smart enough to have started saving bits of the money that he gave you because your smartass didn’t pay attention in maths. A+B= D for Dummy.

Now I’m not saying that you shouldn’t aim for a happy family because nobody wants to die alone but don’t write your future off just cause Mr. Right is taking his time and Mr. Right Now bought you data bundles. Someone once told me that a woman can have a house, a car and money but as long as she doesn’t have a man she’s nothing. Sue me for not wanting someone who constantly has one thing on his mind to define me. I don’t even know which words to define myself and I’m supposed to expect somebody to do it and do it for the rest of our lives? Shout out to those young bloods getting married young, you know yourself and you’re ready to go through the last stages of puberty and menopause with this person so be my guest.. Not everybody is as confident as you are at that age.

No…This wasn’t a bash at the wonderful male species. I have no issue with them. I just get so sick and tired of people assuming that all a girl wants in life is to get married and have babies. Nah… What we want in life is; to get a degree, get a great job, be able to afford our own homes, eat without getting fat, fit great into everything that we want to and have a hubby who is not intimidated by our immense success. So if there’s a guy out there like that… Will you marry me?

(LOL If I fall in love and I end up disregarding everything I just typed)


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